5 Tips For Dating With Kids

Recently I was interview by Studio 5’s Brooke Walker about dating advice for single parents. As things change quickly in the dating world, I took to the Facebook streets to find out what single parents are dealing with. Boy what a firestorm that drummed up! These two comments summarize it all though:

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With those comments in mind, here are my 5 tips for dating as a single parent:

  1. Make Time For Love – You’re busy — beyond busy, really. In fact it would probably be easier to wait to date until your kids are out of the house, right? And all the drama dating kicks up, who wants to deal with that and the drama that every day life can hold for a single parent?  There’s nothing more important than providing a loving, stable environment for your kids to be in. Yet one of the contributing factors to that kind of environment is YOU being in a loving, stable relationship. Your kids seeing you happy, content, and cared for – that’s significant to their happiness and belief in love too. Please carve out time to pursue this crucial cause.
  2. Be Honest – It may seem convenient to “leave the kids out of it” by not owning up to the fact that you actually have kids. Yet by all accounts this is known as false advertising. Being a single parent is now a part of your personal brand and lying or purposely with holding that fact is essentially setting your relationship up for failure. Throw a few picts of you and your kids in online profile photos and on Facebook and that’s all you have to do. People will know, you’ll be honest, and your next relationship can start out on a truth-based foot.
  3. Safety First– This may vary by age of your child, but when it comes to the first few dates with someone – please meet them in a public place away from your home. Don’t have dates pick you up there, and don’t have them drop you off there. Your children are your most valuable possession and safeguarding them is your first priority.
  4. Get Serious Before You Get Serious – Stability in your children’s lives in crucial so introducing them to a bunch of random suitors isn’t the best thing you can do for that stability. Before you take the serious step of introducing someone to your children, be sure you’re serious about your love interest first. If you’ve gone out with someone 5-10 times you’re probably safe to do a quick introduction before your next date.
  5. Watch For Kid Chemistry – When you have kids, chemistry isn’t just about you and the other person any more – that chemistry extends to your children as well. While there are a lot of contributing factors to why your kids may or may not respond to another person, its crucial to watch for chemistry between your children and your love interest. This isn’t a one time event, it can be over a period of time, but keep in mind this person is vying for the hearts of your children not just your own.

I know there can be deeply varying opinions on this topics and I would love to hear yours. If you have tips or personal rules you follow for dating with kids, please share in the comments below.